


The One who Always Gets Hurt

by Witchyjuju



Category: The Vampire Diaries & Related Fandoms, The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Vampire Bonnie Bennett
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-25 14:14:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30090342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Witchyjuju/pseuds/Witchyjuju
Summary: In life there's a lot of what ifs. What if Katherine had given Bonnie blood in the cave? Then she killed Bonnie causing her to start her transition in to a vampire. How will Bonnie deal with transitioning? will she complete it? Who will be there for her during this time? How will a certain vampire  react to the little witch becoming a vampire?(Sorry I'm bad at summaries please give it a shot)
Relationships: Bonnie Bennett/Damon Salvatore
Comments: 12
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone. So this is a fanfic I first wrote and never finished so I'm moving it here and plan on finishing it. I also made some changes from my original so I hope you like it. And also sorry for mistakes I have no beta. This occurs at the end of episode 14 in season 4. Also sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes no beta. Please let me know your thoughts!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own The Vampire Diaries, or Bamon would be canon. Nor do I own the books.

Pain exploded in Bonnie's back as the hunter stuck a knife into it. Her body fell hitting the ground hard. The witch could feel warmth from her blood as it poured from her back. Everything in her mind started to become clouded from the pain and her vision blurred. She could hear Jeremy promising her that everything would be okay, but she couldn't even see him now. Her eyelids felt heavy. It took all her strength to keep her eyes open. 

The young hunter turned to the older one screaming his anger at him for what had happened to Bonnie. Then who he believed to be Elena came running in and was about to bite the man. Quickly Jeremy yelled trying to prevent his sister from falling victim to the curse, "Don't! The hunter's curse."

The brunette vampire shoved the man causing him to crack his head on the rocks around them. Her dark eyes focused on Jeremy. "Are you okay?" she asked looking at him with fake concern trying her best to act like the kind older sister. 

Jeremy nodded at her. He turned to look at Bonnie not moving on the ground and the panic he felt came back as he saw the amount of blood pooling around her small body, "Elena's here now everything is going to be all right." 

Katherine rolled her eyes and thought how much she hated pretending to be Elena; she went over and bit her wrist then put it to the witch's lips. "Jeremy feed Silas; we need to wake him to get the cure before Rebekah gets here." She glanced down as she felt the little witch begin to drink her blood. She knew she would have to get out of here before the witch was healed fully or risk her wrath from learning she was not the real Elena.

"What? We can do that after Bonnie is fully healed." Jeremy looked at her slightly in disbelief that she thought the cure was so important than her friend. 

Katherine looked down as she felt the witch beginning to stir, she knew if she let her come to she was as good as dead. If she waited till she was fully healed the others would surely show up. A devious smile formed on her lip as a plan occurred that would stop the witch from hurting her and cause the little Scooby gang some problems to deal with so she could get away, "Oh little Gilbert you are such an idiot."

Jeremy's eyes widen as he realized that the vampire in front of him wasn't Elena. "Katherine!" He said as he heard a loud snapping noise. Then before he knew it Katherine's fangs dug into his neck.

The vampire then brought him to the immobilized immortal and let him drink. When Silas brought up his arm to hold the human there Katherine took her chance to grab the cure and leave. She sped off quickly not bothering to look back knowing her plan would cause chaos for those left behind.

Jeremy felt his blood being drained and his life slipping from him. Once the immortal was done Jeremy's lifeless body fell to the ground.

Silas rose and looked around at his surroundings. He let out an almost bored sigh as he looked at the man he just drained the life from. Then his eyes fell on the lifeless looking girl not too far away. He went over and picked her up. There was something familiar about her. Maybe she will be of some use he thought as he walked away.

After some time, Elena reached the spot where her dead brother lay. When her ears heard no heart beat she felt like a black whole was where her heart once was. She went over and cradled his head in her lap as she began to rock him. "The ring will bring you back." she repeated over and over to herself.

Stefan had come in the area with her, as he watched at a loss for words on how he could comfort her. Now Elena had no family left. She won't be able to survive this. He thought as he turned around, his ears picked up the footsteps of someone. He prayed it was Bonnie maybe she could be of some help or explain what had happened.

Instead Stefan was met with his raven haired older brother. Damon smelled blood all around. Jeremy blood and was that blood the little Bennett witch’s. Questions were about to leave his mouth when his brother spoke.

Stefan looked down and said in a low voice, "Jeremy is dead."

Damon looked at him in shock for a moment then it occurred to him. "So Jeremy is dead?" Damon asked. "He has the ring right? This isn’t the first time he has died." He watched as Stefan shook his head.

In hushed tone he spoke, "He was a hunter Damon."

Damon let out a sigh of defeat knowing that Stefan was right and Elena’s brother was gone for good this time. His blue eyes looked at Stefan, "We need Bonnie. I smell her blood is there any sign of her? He watched Stefan shake his head, "Dammit." Damon said. The cogs in his head began to turn. "Alright you get Elena off the island and I will stay to find Bonnie."

Stefan was going to protest when Elena’s worried words caused his attention to draw back to her, “Elena I’ll carry Jeremy let’s just get out of here.”, he spoke calmly trying not to raise her worry

He took Jeremy’s lifeless body carrying him gently as he led Elena out of the cave. Hoping Bonnie was okay and could fix this mess.

It had been an hour since Silas had risen and he felt amazing. He managed to build a fire far away from the tomb in a hidden spot. Now he was able to focus onto this young girls mind. He learned she was a Bennett witch. "Perfect" he mumbled to himself. Silas had to concentrate hard to find her thoughts, they were very weak. He figured it was because he had fed on only the one human.

After he did this for a while longer he realized something. This girl wasn't breathing. He walked over to her body and pressed his ear to her chest. Sure enough her heart wasn't beating. "Yet your mind is intact and growing stronger." this puzzled the immortal then he realized what was happening. This girl was going through transition into becoming a vampire. This helped him in no way. She wouldn’t be able to be a tool for his plans after all.

Silas let out a sighed and stood. He would just have to find another powerful witch to help him. Part of him wished she wasn't transitioning. A Bennett witch is just what he could use, especially one who sacrificed so much for her friends she would be easy to control. He walked off leaving the girl to fend for herself in the woods.

After a few hours Bonnie started to awaken. She looked around and saw that she wasn't in the cave she had passed out in. Slowly she sat up and reached at her back feeling dried blood on her clothes but as her fingers touched her skin it felt complete healed. This perplexed the small girl for a moment. Then she remembered Elena... No Katherine fed her blood to heal her that was why the wound healed.

Bonnie tried to remember what happened after that, but nothing came to her mind. Her green eyes scanned the area around her, though it seemed to be very bright to her. She saw a small fire pit that had gone out some time ago leaving a flicker of embers when a gust of wind blown it.

"Well I should find the others." she mumbled to herself as she slowly stood. Her hands began to brush some of the leaves of her clothes. Her head was pounding and she could swear she hear a deer stepping on a branch though she couldn’t see it. The thought made her laugh slightly, what was she thinking it must be the pounding head ache she felt that was messing with her.

The dark haired girl walked from the spot trying to find anyone of her friends. She wanted nothing more than to find out how she got out here and to make sure they were all okay. With each step she started to notice how noisy the forest could be. How did I never notice that before? The birds were nearly screaming at her from all around.

As she walked her ears picked up a voice she knew all too well. Though she couldn't seem to make out the words coming from Damon's mouth she knew if she kept walking she would reach him soon. The thought made her let out a sigh of relief. She never thought she would feel relieved to find Damon Salvatore. Yet it seemed her legs weren’t moving fast enough to get her there.

After a few minutes she got in range to hear his voice, "I-I can't show up without Bonnie!" he exclaimed in an angry voice.

Bonnie could swear she felt her lips pulling into a smile. Her left hand rose to them and sure enough they were. God I need to get off this island. It's messing with my head. Just because Damon wanted to find her didn’t mean he actually cared. Bonnie pushed through the woods and was met with the sight of Damon.

The dark haired man let out a sigh of relief. He didn't know the sight of the young witch could cause him to exhale so deeply, "I could actually hug you right now." he said as she walked to him slowly.

Then before his mind could catch up with his actions he hugged her. Bonnie's body was small epically compared to his and she raised her arms to hug him back. Her green eyes closed and she let her body sink into his. Bonnie’s eyes were glad for the relief from the bright sun and the feeling of his arms was oddly comforting to her.

"Where have you been?" he asked before he pulled away to look at her over. He saw something was off about her. She had different feeling about her, not the typical powerful witch vibe he got. "How did you find me?"

"I just followed your voice. You talk so loud it's hard to miss." Bonnie said. She stayed near allowing his hands to stay on her body as her eyes closed to try and protect them from the bright sun.

Then Damon realized what was different about her and his blue eyes widened. He shook his head, "No no. Just... No. Bonnie what happened?"

Bonnie stared at him confused. "What do you mean?"

Taking a breath Damon tried to prepare himself for what was about to come out of his lips. He knew it would be earth shattering for the girl and for those she knew. A part of him was afraid to speak the truth outload, but another knew there was no point in lying to her. "You are in transition." He watched as her green eyes widen in disbelief and confusion. Sometimes he hated the witch, but he never wanted this to happen to her. She was Elena's best friend for crying out loud and the only witch that would help them. She had only recently gotten okay with her best friends being vampires now she was.

Bonnie’s head shook desperately as she pulled away from him. “No… No. Damon you’re lying to me. I’m not transitioning.” Her mind raced trying to remember what had happened to her there had to be another explanation, Damon had to be wrong.

“Bonnie, you are.”, he said simply hating that he had to be the one to do this. 

No longer able to support herself Bonnie collapsed to the ground her eyes focused on nothing as tears fell down her face.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So about Jeremy. He will stay dead. While I do love Jeremy, I just think it would be best for him to stay dead in this version. Plus he has been brought back more times than I can count, As usual no beta so excuse any mistakes.
> 
> Also big TRIGGER WARNING for this chapter suicidal like thoughts (no actions) but just want to warn you Bonnie mind does get dark this chapter. There is also talk of blood
> 
> if that will affect your mental health I will included a small summary at end of chapter so you do not have to read. 
> 
> Disclaimer: No I do not own The Vampire Diaries.

"No." was the single word on repeat leaving her lips before her breathing began to pick up speed. Bonnie's legs were numb as she sat on the forest floor. Her eyes were fixed on her hands as panic and fear rose in her chest. Everything around her started to fade as her mind raced playing over the events she remembered in the cave. Katherine hadn't whacked the witch's head causing her to pass out like she assumed, Katherine had snapped her neck. Everything made sense, the light sensitivity, being able to hear Damon and the hunger inside of her that seemed to be growing. 

Why? Why did this have to happen to me? She thought as tears fell from her eyes. This wasn't fair, Bonnie had lost so much in her life all for her friends and now she was in the woods at the beginning of the transition to becoming a vampire. The same creature she hated the same thing her mother was forced into. She would lose her connection with nature. Lose the one thing that made her feel whole and special; made her feel of use to her friends.

Damon bent down to her level with his hands gripping her arms and he felt how badly she was shaking, "Bonnie listen to me. Calm down, take a deep breath." On the inside he was freaking out just as bad with tons of questions flying through his mind. How the hell am I going to fix this? First Jeremy had to die and now the judgey little witch is becoming a judgey little vampire. Everything had gone to shit. Nothing had turned out like he had pictured. This was supposed to be the trip to fix his problems, not create new ones for him to deal with. 

Just thinking about how utterly helpless he had been to stop these things from happening just caused his anger to build. "Listen dammit." he said in a harsher tone. Logically he knew Bonnie was only a victim in all this, still he let his anger control his words. "Fucking listen to me."

Bonnie's green eyes continued to water and focused on nothing around her. Inside she knew she had been ready to die for her friends on more than one occasion, but this fate was worse than death for her. Both her closest friends were vampires, but she knew she didn't want to be one. In her heart she knew she couldn't take anything that came with being a vampire. She would be the creature that was against everything witches stood for. The connection she felt with nature would be lost along with the Bennett witches. There would never be another. What would grams think of this? If she had the choice would she complete the transition?

There was another solution to this but it's not like they would give her the cure to become a witch again. There was only and nearly everyone she knew would want Elena to have it. After all they had been willing to let Bonnie die for her before.

Nothing the vampire said was snapping her out of this trance like state. Bonnie had been the only witch to help the band of misfits he somehow was a part of. Now she was going to be a vampire like the rest of them.

A fist collided with the dirt around Damon, using all his force helped to release some of the rage he felt. There was still a great amount of anger within Damon, but he felt like he could think a little more clearly. The dark hair man ran his hand through his hair and thought of what to do. Focus, Bonnie just needed to focus and get out of her own head.

Slowly he raised his pale hands to turn her face to look straight at him. His blue eyes desperately searched her green ones trying to find the powerful and stubborn girl he knew. "Bonnie please. Just focus for a minute." he spoke slowly trying to will all his anger away. Right now he needed to calm her down so the two of them could fix this shit of a mess they were now in and get back to Mystic Falls. 

"Bonnie, listen to me, we can fix this together. Just like how we figured out everything else that has come our way.” Damon wasn’t sure if he was lying or telling her the truth there might not be a way to fix this mess, but he would try. “First you need to snap out of this."

A way to fix this. Damon's words reached her as a sudden dark realization came to Bonnie's mind. She knew a way to never turn into a vampire; she just had to die not complete the transition. Simple enough, she could do that and die as a witch. The tide of emotions that had overtaken Bonnie slowly began to be pushed back as her breathing slowed. Racing thoughts turned into ways of how to say goodbye to all her friends when she faintly heard Damon's voice still begging her to snap out of her trance. 

It was then she realized he was holding her face in his cool hands leaving their face closer than they had ever been. Her eyes began to focus on his blue ones staring at her intensely with a mixture of fear, anger and she thought she saw actual concern. His repeated words about how they could fix this broke through to her, "Okay" she managed to whisper. 

Damon let out a breath he wasn't aware he was holding when he heard her voice. The bright green eyes before him finally focused, staring into his own. After he was sure that Bonnie was more grounded, he removed his hand realizing he had actually cupped her cheek in his hand.

"There we go Judgey. First things first we need to get off this island and go back to Mystic Falls." the vampire stood from the ground looking to find where the boats were. Something in him knew he should tell her about Jeremy, but he also knew if he did she could go into that shut down mode he had just witnessed and he wasn’t sure she would come out of it. The best option was to let her adjust and then break the news at a later time. Besides she isn't even a witch so no spell could bring him back. 

Finding her way home was simple enough in Bonnie's mind, focus on getting back home then worry about saying her goodbyes. Before her time was up she would do everything in her power to ensure her friends were safe and they had heartfelt goodbyes to remember her. This helped to bring back some of the young girl's fire and determination, her eyes clearly showing the change. "So which way do we go?"

Slowly she stood from the spot on the forest floor taking a moment to steady herself before looking back at Damon.

\---------------

They were in the car and it was about another half an hour till they reached the town. Throughout the whole ride Bonnie kept questioning why they were the only two left on the island. Damon still held the secret about Jeremy's death and planned to do so till the last possible moment. He thought maybe if she was with Elena and the others they could grieve as one then move on to getting blood into Bonnie. Since so far his attempts and jokes to get her to feed did no good.

"So Judegy are you sure you don't want to stop at a little diner for a drink? Or if you want I would even be willing to grab you a blood bag from a hospital if you don't think you can handle the source." Damon said to her with a playful smile on his lips. In his mind humor and sarcasm was the best cure for things, well that and killing people could do the trick too. So he tried to make light of her situation. He had even said the three girls could be like the vampire version of Charlie’s Angels.

"For the last time Damon, the answer is no." Bonnie said, shaking her head. The hunger inside her was growing with every minute. Taking a breath she tried to calm the anger towards him. Though she couldn't stand the vampire she didn't have the strength to fight with him in what would be her final hours. 

"So are you going to tell me why everyone is already back in town?" her voice was becoming more desperate with each time she asked him. She turned to look at him hoping that maybe a stare down would be enough to get him to tell her, then again when did Damon Salvatore ever make things easy.

His jaw clenched and he gave the steering wheel a tight squeeze. "I will, just not right now."

And with those words Bonnie forgot her efforts to stay calm. "What the hell Damon?! Obviously something happened to someone. I am not an idiot. Did we lose the cure?" Her body was tense as she yelled at him and her hands turned into firsts. "Tell me! These are my friends we are talking about I need to know. For Christ sake I can take whatever it is. I can fix it." Everything in her knew she needed to fix whatever the problem was before she was gone, but how the hell was she supposed to if the vampire next to her told her nothing.

He managed to stay quiet while she screamed at him. In all their interactions he had seen her mad, frustrated and scared. The voice she was yelling at him with now was unlike anything he had heard from her. Still he stayed silent that is until she said she could take it, that she would fix it. He pressed his right foot down hard on the break causing his car to skid on the road. The wind was knocked from Bonnie as she was launched forward then was stopped by the abrupt force of the seat belt.

Damon turned his blue eyes on her and they were practically glowing with his anger. "You can't handle it Bonnie alright? You had a fucking meltdown over starting the transition into a vampire. You can't handle what happened on the island." As he spoke his eyes never left the side of her face. Not to mention the girl was in the middle of transitioning and still was only thinking of fixing other people's problems, her selflessness was starting to piss him off.

"How the hell would you know what I can handle?" she managed to say after catching her breath. Though she felt his gaze on her she didn't bother to look up at him. "I can handle whatever happened out there. I’ve done and handle everything that has come my way since you showed up in town.” Resentment filled her chest as she squeezed her fists together. “That is what I do Damon, I fix the messes that everyone else seems to get themselves into." Though part of her knew that was harsh and had her emotions not been all over the place she probably would never even speak the thought out loud.

A dry laugh came from Damon; he did not need this right now. "Jeremy is dead and that little ring of his isn't going to bring him back this time. There now you know. Still think you can handle it?" his words came out from his clenched teeth.

The girl next to him quickly wiped away the tears as they fell. It was her worst fear, that someone she cared about was gone again. I will not let him see me cry again. I will not let him be right. She turned her head to look out the window as she composed herself. She would fix just like she always did and she would before it was too late.

Damon slightly regretted what he said but it was what she wanted, she wanted to know what happened so he told her. It was the truth and she should have just let it go. So why could he feel the regret in his chest grow. Sure the girl was going through hell today, but she had yelled at him to find out the truth; it wasn’t his fault. He shook his head and began to drive again.

Bonnie took a deep breath and tried to keep her voice from cracking. "We need to go to my house. I will find a way to bring him." She turned to focus her eyes on him and didn't look away from him till he turned and nodded. Only then did she continue. "I will invite you in when we get there so you can help me find a way to fix this." She couldn't believe what she just said. Though she knew she needed another person to help her find the solution and to keep looking when she said her goodbyes. "Damon I need you to do something for me."

The vampire raised his eyebrow at her, "Sure whatever. What is it?" He figured he could do it, she was going to bring the little Gilbert back or at least try. So if the former miss witch needed something he could help. Plus he owed her for how he had broken the news to her.

"When we get there, call Matt and Caroline so I can say goodbye. I will write a letter to Elena, but she can't open it till I save Jeremy and I have passed on." Bonnie believed the vampire didn't care so what did it matter to him if she died. Once she helped Elena she would have no purpose in his life anyway or so she believed.

The words had reached his ears, but something in his mind didn't understand what she was saying until he heard her say ‘passed on'. He then realized what she was saying Bonnie Bennett isn't going to become a vampire, she was planning on dying.

\----

"There is nothing in this one either!" Bonnie slammed the last of her grimoire and leaned back feeling utterly defeated and exhausted. Not only was she going to die on Elena, but she could not find a single spell or anything to help her bring him back.

"Well slamming the book won't make one appear Judgey." Damon said as he sat on the other side of the couch. He closed the book in his head having found nothing. "Nothing is in here."

Since he realized her plan they hadn't said more than a few words and he knew his time to say goodbye would be ending soon. Caroline and Matt would be showing up any moment.

"Listen Bonnie, there isn't anything else you can do. Leave it be and I will fix things." his voice was serious as he spoke and it even showed some compassion within it. He had never thought of Bonnie as someone he cared about. He had said over and over that Elena was more important. Still something in his didn’t like the idea of Bonnie being gone. It was almost like the night of the 70s dance the anger he had felt at the idea of losing her. Back then he said it was because he didn’t want Klaus to win at something else. This time he couldn’t make an excuse for why he was mad at her for giving up and not becoming a vampire. Mad that she wouldn’t be there to bother with his nicknames. 

He pushed those thoughts from his mind, after all Bonnie hated him so it’s not like his words would change her mind. Putting on his typical smirk as he teased, "So with what time you have left you might as well sleep with me. I mean you don't want to die a virgin, plus I am the best you could ever have."

"Shut up Damon." Bonnie said as she glared at him. He knows I am going to die and he still can't be serious. "I don't feel like arguing." Her body was beginning to ache all over and she didn't even have strength to yell at him. Even reading was starting to become difficult as her mind and body craved something she refused to give it. Slowly she slid into a more comfortable position on the couch.

Damon watched her and could tell she wasn't going to last till the next morning. She looked so small as she curled up. Granted he knew she was small, but she always carried such power with her. As she laid on the couch now she looked so weak and like her fire was slowly going out. This may be his last chance to say anything nice and if anyone deserved a rare Damon apology it was her. He had caused this girl some serious heart ache, none of it she deserved. In all honesty Bonnie deserved more than just an apology from him, but it was the best he could do. "Listen Bonnie. I am so sor-" 

Matt and Caroline burst through the door and looked at Bonnie. Concern clear on their faces, but before either spoke their eyes fell on Damon. Caroline glared at him before she looked at Bonnie with a questioning look as to why Damon was there. 

Seeing Blondie glaring at him was where Damon drew the line after the day's events he didn’t need to deal with her. So he stood and made his way over to the door. He looked back at Bonnie for the last time. His blue eyes were surprisingly met by her green ones watching him leave. He gave her a sad smile and waved before walking out of the house.

Bonnie’s eyes lingered where the vampire had been standing. Was Damon really going to say sorry? After everything they had been through Bonnie never would expect an apology from him. The smallest smile formed on her lips before she turned her attention back onto her friends.

Caroline was cleaning up the grimoires scattered around the room, cleaning was her default when she stressed. Matt just simply sat down next to Bonnie on the couch.

"So did you find anything? Why didn't you come to Elena's house? She needs you." Caroline said in a sudden rush as she picked up more books.

Bonnie felt a tear fall. She felt so useless at that moment. "I couldn't find anything." She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to calm her breathing. If she was too upset there was no way she would get through these goodbyes. 

Matt had a million questions for Bonnie about what had happened on the island. If Elena had been right that Damon held some love for Bonnie. Pushing his questions aside he focused on her instead since she seemed upset. "Bon what is wrong?"

Slowly she sat up so she could better look at the two. "There is something you should both know. I didn't go to Elena's house because I don't want her to know yet." She looked at her friends as they tried to understand what she was saying. Before she could change her mind Bonnie told them everything she could remember from being on the island. As she spoke tears came down her face, but she managed to get the words out before finally adding, "So now I am transitioning into a vampire."

The two stared and her for a moment. Caroline dropped the books she had been fixing up staring at her best friend. The blonde knew exactly what Bonnie was feeling and she hated that she was going through this. Rushing to Bonnie she dropped down in front of her gripping her small ones. “I will be there to teach you everything. I promise.”

Matt just sat still unmoving. He knew just how being a vampire had changed Elena, what would happen to Bonnie.

"Caroline… Listen.” Bonnie squeezed her friends hands focusing on them rather than either of their faces. "I have decided not to complete it." Before either one could protest she spoke in rused, but forceful tone. "It is my decision. Please I just.. I can't become a vampire."

Matt tried to hold back a sob; however tears still managed to fall from his eyes. "Bonnie please. You can't leave us. We just lost Jeremy." Silently he cursed everything supernatural in the world. When he spoke the name Bonnie began to cry more, but he continued "Caroline help me out here."

Caroline stared blankly at the two. She had been through this with her father and the blonde didn't know if she could handle going through it with her best friend too. "Bonnie you have to. I-I can't lose you." She closed her eyes as tears began to fall, her head shaking back and forth. "You are my best friend. If you are gone..." The vampire couldn't even manage to finish the thought. 

When Caroline first had transitioned and Bonnie stopped talking to her she felt more alone than ever. It had been physically painful not to have her best friend for that short time. Now the girl was saying she would be gone forever? No, Caroline couldn’t accept that. Insticlily she drew back from Bonnie staring at her with disbelief and anger as she stood looking down at the darker skinned girl. 

Bonnie wrapped her arms around her small frame as if she was trying to keep herself from shattering into a million pieces. "I have made up my mind. It is for the best believe me." She would not let them change her mind. This was what she wanted to never become a vampire and die as close to human as possible. "I didn't have Damon get you both here so you could convince me to stay. I just wanted to say goodbye."

Matt’s tears were turning into a sob at the thought of losing another person. 

Caroline said, still looking at the girl on the couch before her. "No Bonnie you can't..."

"Matt listen to me. After I am done I want you to go wait for Caroline in the car." Bonnie had known him most of her life and if he sat here and saw how painful it was for her to say goodbye he would join forces with Caroline to try and change her mind. She waited until he was looking at her before she spoke again. 

"I want you to live your life okay? You have one of the best shots of having a normal life. Don't let anyone take that from you. Play football, work at the grill or do whatever YOU want to do. Just make sure you are happy. If not for yourself then for the both of us. You will survive this place and go on to live a good life." Bonnie turned her small body to hug him. Using the remanence of her strength to resist biting him. Tears fell from her eyes as she spoke softly, "Goodbye Matt."

"G-Goodbye Bonnie." They released one another. Matt quickly walked out of the door and dared not to look back at Bonnie. He knew if he did he wouldn't let her die and she would hate him for taking her choice away. Matt never wanted to be like the Salvatores and take someone’s choice from them. So even if this was hurting him in every possible way, he would not force her to drink.

"Don't." Caroline whispered when Bonnie turned back to her. "Don't say it." The blond's body shook insistently as she cried. “It’s not fair Bonnie! You’re my best friend and you’re going to leave me. Just like my dad. Why is being a vampire so bad to you? Do you still hate me?”

Bonnie reached out for her best friend's hands. “I don’t hate you Caroline, but I’m a witch. I can’t go through being a vampire. The connection I feel with nature and my powers is terrifying to give up forever.” 

“Please don’t leave me Bonnie.”, she cried out. “We could try to find the cure for you. We can try something.”

“We both know I would never get it over Elena.” Bile rose in her throat for speaking the truth out loud like that. “Besides we don’t even know where it is.”

“Please, I don’t want to say goodbye to you.” Caroline sat next to her friend pulling her in for a hug gripping her tightly afraid to let go. 

Bonnie snuggled in close to her friend allowing her own tears to fall. "I”m sorry, but you have to and once I’m done you should go.”, Taking in another breath she ready herself. “Caroline. Thank you for everything you have done for me. I don't think I could have made it through this life without you. Your smile and words were always there when I needed you. Even when everything seemed to be complete hell you helped to remind me that things could still get better. Don't think that because I am not going to feed it means I hate you or any other one of our friends. I just can't give up being a witch to keep living." Caroline nodded her head and sobbed louder. "Now I want you to promise me that you will keep your optimistic attitude and keep moving forward. You are destined for amazing things Ms. Caroline Forbes. Don't you ever stop smiling Caroline Forbes." She pulled back to look at the blonde. "Goodbye Caroline. I love you."

"I-I love you too Bonnie." Caroline hugged her one last time and stood. Rushing to the door she looked back at Bonnie. Knowing no matter how much she begged or asked Bonnie had made up her mind, "Goodbye." she said as she closed the door and left.

The craving for blood was more intense than Bonnie had anticipated. Though she could barely move she still craved it so desperately. Her green eyes focused on the clock on her night stand. It was only 3:17am. Who knew how much longer she would be alive. Mentally she checked that all the letters to people she loved were written. She had written three in total; one for her mother, one for her father and the last one for Elena. It would be better to say goodbye through her words on a paper than in person.

Bonnie curled up under her blankets. The warmth from them comforted her slightly. There was nothing else for her to do, but to try and to sleep. She hadn’t found a way to bring Jeremy back, but maybe she would see him again once she passed on. Closing her eyes Bonnie allowed all her worries to fade away. Well she had lived a nice enough life now she just had to let go and be at peace. Then she could be with her Grams again and maybe meet more Bennett witches. 

Slowly the vampire came into the Bennett home and looked around for Bonnie. He didn't see her on the couch so he made his way to her room. The dark haired man didn't really know what he was doing he just let his body move. His brain was too clouded from the bourbon to think much of anything. All he knew was he was going to force the damn girl to drink the blood bag in his hand, even if she hated him for it. He didn’t know if he needed her to drink it so Elena wouldn’t lose her or if he didn’t want to lose her. Either way she would drink.

The vampire reached Bonnie's room and slowly entered it. His blue eyes stayed on the girl as she lay in her bed not moving. Once he reached her bed he gently touched her cheek. Taking in how peaceful she looked, almost like she wasn’t letting herself fade into nothing. Well he knew she wouldn't really be peaceful after what he was about to do.

The white fangs in his mouth ripped the top of the blood bag and he quickly brought it to Bonnie's lips. He knew her body would do the rest since the hunger had probably grown like none she had ever felt before. Seeing her drink the bad still pleased him, as twisted and as selfish as he was being. “Drink up Judgey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary for those who might have triggers from dark thoughts:
> 
> Damon manages to get Bonnie to snap out of her panic enough for the two of them to leave the island. In the car ride home he tells her Jeremy was killed this upsets her but she doesn't let Damon see her cry. When back in Mystic her grimioires are of no help in trying to find a way to bring Jeremy back.   
> Bonnie does not plan on completing transition so she says goodbye to Caroline and Matt leaving letters for others she cares about. Damon however comes into her room that night and forces her to drink blood and become a vampire.


End file.
